Dear Addie,
After eight weeks of being surrounded by Christmas magic (yes, I start decorating on Halloween), I assure you that the outside of our house still has a "spooktacular" vibe while I transform the interior into a Christmas wonderland that Santa, his elves, and even my beloved Grinch would be proud of. But I digress. It all comes down to this: Christmas, followed by your birthday the next day! It’s a celebration sandwich, if you will. But a sandwich for someone who doesn't exactly feel to keen on the excitement of it all.
Allow me to explain.
The Christmas season can be particularly overwhelming for individuals on the autism spectrum. The bright lights, festive music, various smells, increased visitors, and even the change in weather when snow arrives (not much of a worry around here) can all be too much for your sensory system to handle. This sensory overload can lead to heightened anxiety during a time when many people typically experience joy and cheer.
It can be challenging for parents who want to create a magical holiday experience. As I mentioned before, the phrase "Predictably Unpredictable" could be complemented by another title: "Don't Take It Personally." This reflects the journey many autism families experience during this time which can also be hard for some visiting friends and family to understand. We've learned over the years that exposure is key, which is why I like to decorate early (wink, wink). There's no point in forcing joy during a holiday that's already filled with it; we just need to follow your lead, and that's exactly what we do.
Christmas morning came and went, presents were opened, laughter was had and you chose to hang back in your room. We checked on you mulitple times asking if you were ready to come down with us, met by your new favorite word "no." As we sat enjoying coffee and tidying up a bit, you had emerged from your room, ready to see what Santa had brought you. You plopped down on the floor in front of the tree, next to a pile of wrapped presents that were stacked and waiting just for you. It was clear that you were still feeling a little uneasy, glancing around at any little sound that was made. Addie, you could have won an award for the speed with which you opened your gifts. In solidly three minutes, they were all unwrapped and piled beside you. You shouted "Thank you!" and ran back to your room. One might wonder if you even liked any of it, but that will take time to process—if it’s anything other than a peanut butter cup!
You spent most of the day going back and forth from your room to join us, without any pressure, and always on your own terms. There were no meltdowns, so in our little world, this was a win for everyone involved.
Addie, our Christmas may not look like most, but everyone felt the magic and joy of the holiday in their own way, just as it should be.
Merry Christmas, baby girl!
Love,
Mom
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