Dear Addie,
‘‘Twas the week before Christmas and all through the house, the hustle and bustle was alive in the south! The shopping was done, the presents were wrapped, Clara and Gabe were begging to see Star Wars Asap!
That’s right Addie! Christmas is quickly approaching. This is the time when our house gets a little crazy - for lack of a better word. I’ll spend a decent amount of time taking inventory of gentle used, lonely toys to donate, or prepare to purge the old broken ones. In theory it seems easy enough, but you my dear add a little wrinkle to this plan!
You see Addie, your bedroom is like The Island of Misfit Toys. It’s true. Nothing gets thrown away, it just winds up here. Where everything has a place, as well as a purpose to you and only you.
Beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder here!
Perfection is far from necessary. Some books are falling apart with their pages loosely scattered about, while others have been drooled on, chewed up, or left outside a bit too long. There are stuffed animal friends barely keeping their stuffing in but if only for a single safety pin holding them together. A jewelry box ballerina who now resembles having been a participant in a top hat magician’s risky circus act. It all lives here, with its only worry now of perhaps being temporary banished to a separate area of your room, but never discarded.
Sure, we can introduce new toys, even exact replicas, but we’d never dare replace any of them. They only get added to the lineup and become sorted amongst like objects. If they were to disappear not on your accord it would surely cause you a great deal of stress. You’re just like every other kid in the regard that you love new toys, but you just seem to hang on to them for a wee bit longer.
You see Addie these aren’t just toys to you. They all provide an amount of stability in a world that can seem chaotic at times. A comfort. Just like your blanket that could give good ole Linus’ a run for his money! Ah yes, the fresh scent of dirt and yogurt. Pure blissful comfort.
Security objects such as blankets are part of the emotional support system that every child needs in their infant and toddler years. These special comforts are known as transitional objects, because they help you make the emotional transition from dependence to independence.
The first emotional dependence a child shows is generally towards a parent - yours was mommy.
As parents we instinctively offer a transitional object at a very young age (like a teddy bear or blanket) not just because its adorably cute to see you all snuggled up with them, but also in hopes it will eventually provide comfort when we are away. It’s your first introduction of a natural way to deal with stress and anxiety. Most often whatever the said object may be tends to share the scent of the mommy or daddy…Hey wait a second, does this mean I smell like dirt and yogurt?! Hmmm..
Your whole room is a happy place of security objects. It’s your safe place and everything in it is consistent in what you expect from it. In the contrary your toys also expect nothing of you. They are not asking you to speak in sentences, use the potty, wash your hands, nope you are in charge here! If you choose to banish all your Fisher Price Little People to under your bed - then so be it! The master has spoken, and no one can refute you!
So, while the tangled, knotted mess that we call “blankie” is your go to comfort, each of these misfit toys is a close second. I’m sure they are grateful to still be given the opportunity to be ready and waiting if you should happen to ever need them.
Merry Christmas Addie, I love you.
Love,
Mom
