Dear Addie, There comes a time in life as parents where we stop and realize just how fast life has gone by. Our thoughts become consumed with the all the little things our kids used to do that were so routine and unique to them. With these thoughts we wonder just why, or when it eventually slipped away to becoming what’s left of a memory? I remember very distinctly around 3 years old Gabe discovered that maybe the English language could be easier if we just took out a few letters here and there and smushed words together, which birthed the word “gorning!” That was the transformation of “good morning” and if I’m being honest, it was so cute that we still throw that one around today occasionally. I mean who wouldn’t with that? He was born to live where words like “y’all” are used. But I digress. For you, life was a little different. You burst on the scene (literally fastest delivery ever), and rewrote our playbook on parenting. Well before a life of doctors, diagnosis’, and endless research, you were our observant, curious, dare devil, quiet child. There wasn’t much that could hold your attention for a long period of time, but that all changed the day you caught a glimpse of a movie Clara and Gabe were watching called The Princess and the Frog. It held your focus like nothing we’d ever seen, you were completely mesmerized. Something about singing, talking frogs and trumpet playing gators just spoke to you.
Until one day... We rode the wave of joy this movie brought to you for a few years and then one day without warning it was just over. The sense of joy was gone and what seemed to be a completely different feeling of anxiety and some sense of fear was triggered in its place. If we put it on, you would abruptly shut it off and run away. Being in your non-verbal years, this left us all confused. Something you had loved so much, was all but gone and you couldn’t tell us why. But not all of it, your love your princess Tiana still held strong (setting a high bar for all other princesses) in the years that followed. Any other princess seemed to pale in comparison to Tiana only getting the color reference of their dress and then Tiana for their name. Cinderella – Blue Tiana. Sleeping Beauty – Pink Tiana. Belle – Yellow Tiana. Nothing was better than Tiana, but we dare not watch the movie. What was it that startled you so much? Fast forward to today and we have ventured down yet another journey of anxiety disorder managing, and the phrase “what’s old is new again” has come to mind. This past weekend you had my phone and just happened to stumble across none other than a YouTube preview for The Princess and the Frog. You didn’t run and scream (or throw my phone shattering it into 1000 pieces, thank goodness), but giggled, flapped and stimmed with excitement rather! I saw no fear what so ever. Seeing how happy you were I asked “Do you want to watch The Princess and the Frog?” You feverishly stimmed saying “Princess and a Frog - yeah!” and ran and plopped yourself down on the sofa, then proceeded to sit through the entire movie looking as happy as ever.
I like to think of memories as old books in our lives as if our journey through all this is creating one big library, and I guess in this case if we are lucky, we get to reread some of the good ones. It’s so nice to see you happy sweet girl. I guess it’s never too late to try again. Enjoy your movie.
Love,
Mom
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